What to Do When He Says He Needs Space
What to do when he says he needs space! Let’s face it, things have been rough lately. It seems like you are fighting more than anything else and every argument takes a piece of your relationship with it. You’ve tried working it out, you’ve tried being patient, but he’s finally had enough. He tells you that he needs space to figure things out. Naturally, you go into freak out mode.
What do I do? How do I get through this?
Well, here are some tips for what to do and what NOT to do when he says he needs some time off…
What to Do: Don’t Ask for Updates
Let him come around when he feels it’s time to come around. If it’s been a really long time, maybe you can hint at getting back together or at least resolving things. This doesn’t mean you can’t have open communication with him, but constantly asking him how things are going and if he’s ready to talk will only annoy him and push him away.
What NOT to Do: Pester the Crap Out of Him
Look, this is a tough decision. He’s probably not taking it lightly. Pestering him, though, will help to make the decision for him. The more you bother him, the more he thinks about how much easier his life would be without you always there nagging him.
What to Do: Stay Faithful
Space doesn’t mean “open season.” Just because you are taking a short break, doesn’t mean that you should look for someone else. Try and stick it out until one of you makes a decision before you move on. If you decide it’s been long enough, you can break it off. If not, continue to stick it out.
What NOT to Do: Sleep with Someone Else
I don’t know why people think this will work, but some women think spiting him will get him back. Jealously usually backfires. If you aren’t faithful during this break, you’ll give him the perfect out and trust me, he’ll take it.
What to Do: Think About YOUR Needs
I know he needs space, but you’re one half on this relationship. Maybe you don’t need or want space. You obviously can’t chain him up to keep him around, but you also don’t have to wait around for him to make up his mind. You have just as much power in this relationship as he has. If you don’t want to wait it out, break it off. He may decide he’d rather have you than space or he might let you go. Either way, at least you know.
What NOT to Do: Suffer Through
Don’t be a martyr. It’s okay to think of yourself and your needs. Don’t try to stick it out to be the hero. If the relationship needs to be severed, sever it.
Space means distance and the more distance there is, the more ground there is to cover. Too much space may separate you to the point where it’s easier to go your separate ways. If you navigate this break correctly, you can come out okay, no matter what happens. Take control and think of your needs. Do it the right way and you can walk away knowing you do the best you could.